Modeling Healthy Relationships for Preschoolers

A preschooler’s world is built around relationships. They learn by watching and imitating the people around them. Preschool leaders can help preschoolers learn to navigate the world of relationships as they model how healthy relationships work.

Here are some ways to help preschoolers build stronger relationships with other preschoolers and with their parents.

Preschooler to Preschooler Relationships

Leaders can model interactions between preschoolers to help preschoolers observe, practice, and learn ways to communicate.

- Use a calm clear voice as you talk with preschoolers. They will soon begin to imitate your tone and calmness when they respond to others.
- Sit with preschoolers as they participate in the activity areas. Pretend play in the Homeliving area, use descriptive words in Music and Nature, encourage compromise and sharing in Blocks, and build vocabulary in Art, Books, and Puzzles and Manipulatives. With your guidance, preschoolers will practice and learn ways to interact and grow relationships with friends.
- Throughout the session, model how to get along, show kindness, share, be helpful, and make friends so preschoolers will see and hear positive words and actions.
- Share how you are feeling throughout the session. Preschoolers will learn ways to express their feelings as they communicate with others. Saying, “I’m afraid of spiders, but I know this one is in a container and it cannot get out,” lets preschoolers hear appropriate expressions of an emotion.
- Model ways to positively disagree. Offering simple ways to express ideas, thoughts, or feelings will help preschoolers understand that everyone does not have to agree all the time. “I like spaghetti, but it’s nice that you like pancakes.”
- Affirm preschoolers when they share their feelings, respond with compassion or concern to another child, extend a friendly offer, or say they are sorry. Your verbal observations will reinforce positive interactions.
- Include role play during Activities and Group Time. This will allow preschoolers to practice building relationships and give them words to express what is going on around them.

Preschooler to Parent Relationships

Leaders may also positively influence preschool and parent relationships.

- Interact with parents in a calm loving way as they drop off their preschoolers at class. Parents will be able to see your sincere caring for their child and will trust leaving their child in your care.
- Carefully observe preschoolers during the session. Jot down quick notes to remember something interesting, kind, or funny a child does. Try to share that tidbit with both the parent and child at pick-up time. Or make a phone call or send a text sharing the incident. The sharing of positive information will help strengthen the preschooler–parent relationship.
- Give concrete examples to parents of things their child does in class, such as, “Maddie was so kind when she helped Parker after he accidentally knocked over his block tower.” Or “Suzy prayed for our missionaries today. She has a heart for others.”
- Build a relationship with the parents of your preschoolers. Share a conversation with a parent and her child together. Parents will see how you value and communicate with their child, and the child will be an important participant in the conversation. Modeling back and forth between parent and child and teacher will set the stage for stronger relationships.

by Gina Smith

Disclaimer: The information shared on this page is not meant to diagnose or treat a mental health condition. We encourage you to follow up with your health-care provider and seek a mental health professional for individual consultation and care.